Favorite books, podcasts, and assessments

Trauma

• Book | Redeeming Heartache: How Past Suffering Reveals Our True Calling

• Book | Anatomy of the Soul: Surprising Connections Between Neuroscience and Spiritual Practices That Can Transform Your Life and Relationships

• Book | What Happened To You: Conversations About Trauma, Resilience, Healing

• Book | The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves

• Book | The Body Keeps Score

• Book | The Best of You: Break Free From Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, Discover Your True Self in God

• Podcast | The Power of Accepting Reality by The Connected Life

• Podcast | Healing Trauma: Your Posture Towards Yourself

• Podcast | Why Engaging Your Story Is The Best Thing You Can Do For Your Brain

Marriage

• Book | How We Love: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage

• Book | Getting the Love You Want

• Book | Hold Me Tight

• Book | Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship

• Podcast | Love and War: Attachment and Intimate Relationships by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | A Blame Free Life-Style by the Connected Life Podcast

• Podcast | What To Do When Our Partners Won’t Change by The Connected Life Podcast

• Assessment: The Five Love Languages

• Assessment | Attachment Styles

• Assessment | Love Styles (attachment styles)

• Course | Marriage online course by the Allender Center

Dating

• Book | Getting The Love You Want

• Book | Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship

• Podcast | 5 Things You Need to Know About Attachment Styles by On Attachment

• Podcast | 5 Dating Tips for Anxiously Attached People by On Attachment

• Podcast | Relationship Red Flags & Green Flags by On Attachment

• Podcast | Q&A: On Dating & Anxious Attachment by On Attachment

• Podcast | 12 Green Lights to Relationships by The Connected Life

Attachment

• Book | How We Love: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage

• Audiobook | Healing Your Attachment Wounds: How to Create Deep and Lasting Intimate Relationships

• Book | Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship

• Podcast | 5 Things You Need to Know About Attachment Styles by On Attachment Podcast

• Podcast | 5 Ways to Support an Avoidant Partner by On Attachment Podcast

• Podcast | 5 Ways to Support an Anxiously Attached Partner by On Attachment Podcast

• Podcast | The Anxious-Avoidant Trap by On Attachment Podcast

• Podcast | Attachment: What It Is and Why It Matters So Much by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | What If I Don’t Remember Most of My Childhood? by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | How Attachment Affects Your Relationship With God by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Assessment | Attachment Styles

• Assessment | Attachment Styles (another)

• Assessment | Love Styles (attachment styles)

Family of Origin Wounds

• Book | Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners

• Book | When He’s Married to Mom: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment

• Podcast | Why Family of Origin Triangulation Is Such a Big Deal by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Covert Sexual Abuse: When Subtlety Equates To Severity by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Implicit Memory: The Thing That Is Running Your Life by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Why Your Family of Origin Impacts Your Life More Than Anything Else by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

The Enneagram

When people ask me to recommend an Enneagram assessment, I point them in the direction of reading or listening to descriptions of each of the Enneagram types. This is because the assessments are not usually accurate because we do not see ourselves clearly and struggle to separate ourselves from our season of life. When reading about the Enneagram types, think about who you were in your early 20s–not who you are “now” or who you want to be.

• Book | The Complete Enneagram by Beatrice Chestnut

• My book | The Art In You and Me: The Enneagram Visualized

• Enneagram Informational Handout

• Online reading of the Types by the Enneagram Institute

• Online reading of the Types II by the Practical Enneagram

• Podcast | Sleeping At Last’s “One”, “Two”, “Three”, etc podcasts on each Enneagram type

Difficult Relationships

• Book | Bold Love

• Book | People of the Lie

• Book | Angry Men and the Women Who Love Them: Breaking the Cycle of Physical and Emotional Abuse

• Book | Stop Walking On Eggshells

• Podcast | 12 Green Lights to Relationships by The Connected Life

• Podcast | The Telltale Signs of a Covert Narcissist

Spirituality and Healing

• Book | The Forgotten Way

• Book | Experiencing The Father’s Embrace

• Book | Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life

• Start with Podcast | Warfare Part 1: The Reality of a War Against Your Heart There are nine podcasts in total

• Podcast | Your Kingdom: The Purpose of Counseling by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Forgiveness: What It Is Not by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Forgiveness: What It Is by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• App | Read Scripture

• TV Series | The Chosen

Sexuality

• Book | Healing The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse

• Book | Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing

• Book | Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners

• Book | Sex, God, and the Conservative Church

• Podcast | Struggling with Sexuality: How Understanding Your Story Can (Surprisingly) Help with Jay Stringer by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Struggling with Sexuality Part 2: How Understanding Your Story Can (Surprisingly) Help with Jay Stringer by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Your Story and Your Sexuality by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Complicity: Why Sexual Abuse Is So Damaging and How To Address It by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Assessment | The Sexual Behavior Assessment by Jay Stringer

• Course | The Journey Course by Jay Stringer

• Online Workshop | The Sexual Attachment Conference by Jay Stringer and Adam Young

• Workshop | Recovery Week by The Allender Center

Boundaries

• Book | Set Boundaries, Find Peace (+ workbook)

• Book | The Best of You: Break Free From Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, Discover Your True Self in God

• Podcast | How to Set Boundaries

Embodiment

• Book | My Grandmother’s Hands

• Book | The Wisdom of Your Body

• Book | Theology of the Womb

• Podcast | Engaging Food and Body by The Allender Center

• Podcast | Food, Kindness, and Our Bodies by The Allender Center

• Podcast | Stories of Our Bodies by The Allender Center

Chronic (Neuroplastic) Pain

• Book | The Way Out

• Workbook | Unlearn Your Pain

• The Pain Psychology Center to schedule a meeting with a pain coach

• Pain Free You Assessment

• Pain Free You Youtube Clip: Is This TMS/PDP?

Emotional Regulation

• Book | Living Like You Mean It

Anxiety and ADHD

• Book for anxiety | Try Softer: A Fresh Approach to Move Us Out of Anxiety, Stress, and Survival Mode--and Into a Life of Connection and Joy

• Book for anxiety | Strong Like Water

• Book for anxiety | The Best of You: Break Free From Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, Discover Your True Self in God

• Book for anxiety | Hope and Help for your Nerves

• All of Curt Thompson’s books

• Podcast | Anxiety: What it is and How to Respond to It by The Place We Find Ourselves

• Podcast | Help! My Brain’s Been Hijacked by The Connected Life

Parenting

• Book | Parenting From The Inside Out

• Book | Raising Passionate Jesus Followers

• Podcast | Parenting: How Your Story Is Affecting Your Relationship With Your Children Part 1 by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Parenting: How Your Story Is Affecting Your Relationship With Your Children Part 2 by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Talking To Your Children About Sex: Two Stories by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Talking To Your Children About Sex: The Practical Stuff by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• The Intentional Parents Podcast (in general)

Grief

• Book | A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows through Loss

• Podcast | Trauma, Catastrophic Loss, and A Grace Disguised (Interview with Jerry Sittser) Part 1 by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Trauma, Catastrophic Loss, and A Grace Disguised (Interview with Jerry Sittser) Part 2 by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

• Podcast | Finding Life In Grief (w/ Laura Duncan) by The Connected Life

Story Work

Podcast | A Pastor’s Journey of Exploring His Story and Addressing His Trauma with Rich Villodas by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Podcast | Parenting: How Your Story Is Affecting Your Relationship With Your Children Part 1 by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Podcast | Why Its So Important to Understand Your Story by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Podcast | Implicit Memory: The Thing That Is Running Your Life by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Podcast | Why Your Family of Origin Impacts Your Life More Than Anything Else by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Podcast | What If I Don’t Remember Most of My Childhood? by The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast

Workshop | The Story Workshop by the Allender Center